Last week we looked at gaining your horse’s respect on the ground and decreasing your fear of him before you get in the saddle.
Now let’s foster your horse’s respect while you mount and when you ride. Ensuring Success Set yourself up for success every step of the way when overcoming your riding fears. Before you get on your horse, I suggest using some ‘safety nets’ to get relaxed. Your horse won’t know that you’ve ‘cheated’ by setting up emotional and physical props: but he will react positively to the calmer person you’ve now become. What Safety Nets? After Cruz reared on me at a big show, I was terrified to get back on him for a long time. Eventually I was willing to try again - but only after I had some safety nets in place. These will make you feel safer, too. 1. Ride in an enclosed arena with the gate closed. 2. Have a competent riding friend on the ground to watch out for you. It’s generally a good idea not to ride alone: even professional riders who aren’t afraid of their horses understand this. So if you can, have a friend ride with you on a quiet horse. This is calming for both you and your horse. 3. Not essential, but if you have one, wear a body protector. It may never be needed, but it will make you feel more secure. Taking these precautions will relax you before you mount. And for the Ultra Nervous… If you’re really scared, I would suggest asking a trusted and competent horse person to ride your horse for a few minutes before you get on him. She will prove to you that there’s nothing to be worried about. (And if there is something to be worried about, maybe this is not the horse for you. I’ll be addressing this in a later post.) Preparing to Mount Lead your horse into the middle of the arena. This gives you lots of space to maneuver when pulling down the stirrups and tightening the girth. Keep your arm looped through the reins at all times, but let your horse stand quietly without you pulling on his mouth. If your horse doesn’t stand still, he’s showing a lack of respect for you. Once again, you need to be a strong leader: increase your authority over him and decrease your fear of him. Do this now, while you’re in the middle of the arena. You’ll be teaching him to stand still for you at the mounting block. Quietly but insistently ask your horse to back up, then halt. Lead him forwards again, and ask him to halt when you halt. Then back him up again. If he responds immediately, give him a pat and continue tightening the girth, etc. If he doesn’t stand still for you, repeat the process as long as necessary until he does. Your horse must respect you at all times. Do this in the spirit of training, rather than as a bullying tactic, and always reward his good behavior. Fairness When Mounting Now you’re ready to lead him to the mounting block where he must stand still for you to get on him. Here, too, remember to be fair on your horse.
Your horse needs to know you’re in charge as soon as you get in the saddle. This doesn’t mean pushing him around. It simply involves leading him firmly in the right direction the whole time you’re riding. You may have heard the term “ride every stride.” If you remember those words, you’ll never leave it up to your horse to make decisions about where to go or what gait to adopt. Take up enough contact with the reins for the horse to know that you are leading him. In the beginning this will not be a strong contact (unless the horse’s attitude warrants it) but just enough for your rein aids to be definite. At the same time, make it clear to your horse through your seat and leg aids that he is to walk - not trot or canter - until you ask him for upward transitions. Preparation Fairness while riding means preparing your horse for a change in direction or gait. When your horse worries that he’s about to run into the boundary fence or wall of the arena because you haven’t told him to turn in plenty of time, he’s going to decide for you. He no longer trusts you as his leader. He’s lost respect for you and has to take over: it’s a matter of self-preservation. Reassure your horse that you are in charge by preparing him well ahead of time for changes in direction or gait. Let him know that you’re a competent leader. Consistency We so often fail to lead our horses properly, then become afraid of them because they “don’t listen to us.” If we look at the situation from the horse’s perspective we’ll understand better why this happens. Often we only assert ourselves when we feel like it, and abandon the horse to his own devices the rest of the time. Examples are doodling in the arena chatting to our friends, or walking the horse off after working him. Remember to ‘ride every stride’ even when you’re both relaxing. Take Charge Too frequently we hope our horse is “going to look after us.” We put him in tricky situations then abandon him when he most needs strong guidance and leadership from us. This is when he’s most likely to react negatively and scare us. My own example is riding my First Level horse in a crowded warm-up arena with Grand Prix horses performing canter half-pass ‘at him.’ I was scared, too, and hoped he could cope without my intervention. He reared vertically because he was being hemmed in by big ‘threatening’ horses and I’d deserted him just when he needed reassuring leadership from me. I should have taken a firm hold of him between my legs, seat and hands and ridden him purposefully between the scary horses, thus increasing his trust in me as a good leader. (If I’d been an even better leader, I wouldn’t have put him in that situation in the first place!) So it’s not always his fault that your horse “behaves badly.” Use clear, consistent aids to tell your horse what you want him to do at all times, and don’t put him in situations that he (and you) are not ready for. If you do this your horse will learn to respect and follow you because he trusts you to be fair and consistent in your leadership. Instead of coping with paralyzing fear every time you get on your horse, you’ll be able to progress with your riding skills and enjoy being a horse owner again. If you have any comments about this post I’d love to hear from you!
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I used to dread riding Cruz. Far from being fun, it had become a frightening chore.
Now I love my horse. Not only that, but I can tell Cruz likes me, too. His whole attitude has changed because my approach to him has taken a U-turn. Exercising Authority In my last post I asked whether you are (a) a figure of authority whom your horse respects? or (b) do you just hope he’s going to behave without giving him firm direction? My own answer to that question used to be a resounding (a) ‘No’ and (b) ‘Yes’! Authority over your horses starts on the ground. A friend who has been through similar issues noted how often we go out of our way not to inconvenience our equine buddies. Let me give you some examples of my own guilt here. Giving Hay Before: Giving Cruz hay was a messy business during which he’d grab it out of my hands while I attempted to place it on the floor. Now: He backs up when I bring his hay and waits for me to place it on the ground before going near it. This took patient, repeated refusals to give him hay until he obeyed my quiet but insistent command to wait for it. Giving Feed Before: It was a race to place feed into the manger before his muzzle thrust me out of the way. Now: He keeps his head to one side until I’ve put the feed in his manger, because I wouldn’t give it to him until he did. Grooming Before: I’d groom him exactly where he stood, even if he was so close to the wall that I was liable to get squashed at any moment! Now: I ask him to move over by pressing him on his side where my leg asks for lateral work under saddle. This way I daily exert my authority and reinforce the aid for moving sideways. Brushing His Face Before: If he wanted to eat hay while I brushed his face, fine - I would work around his munching. Because I wanted him to like me, I tried not to ‘upset him’ by interfering with his agenda. Now: I hold his head up for brushing. If he tries to lower it again, I hang onto it until I’m done. He gives a big sigh and closes his eyes to enjoy the feeling of the brush strokes. I was astounded at my blatant lack of authority over Cruz in even the smallest things. Now he enjoys being groomed and hangs his ‘fifth’ leg. He has surrendered leadership to me, which allows him to relax. This is a vital component of the trust building process under saddle, too. (It’s interesting to note that he also no longer pouts with his head in the corner when I bring the saddle, but has a friendly, welcoming stance.) Any of This Sound Familiar? There are many ways to inadvertently lose our horse’s respect. Yet gaining his respect is vital to the process of eliminating our fears. Do you recognize your situation in any of these on-the-ground scenarios? a. Your horse won’t let you catch him b. He drags you along when you lead him from the field c. He stops to munch grass on the way back to the barn d. He won’t stand still while you groom him If your horse frightens you, first examine your relationship with him on the ground and address those areas where he is in charge, and not you. We need to be a competent leader on the ground before we can expect our horse to obey us under saddle. The Pay-Off As your horse’s respect for you increases, your fear of him will decrease. Then you’ll be ready to lead him (in a quiet and orderly fashion!) into the riding arena. Note I say ‘into the riding arena’ not ‘off for a trail ride’. I strongly advise you to ride in an enclosed area when you’re working on your riding fears. Next Friday I’ll go through how to minimize fear by commanding your horse’s respect while sitting in the saddle. We all want to feel safe when riding, but fear often sabotages our chances of that. Maybe it’s because we’ve had a bad experience in the past, or recently with the horse we now ride.
In my previous post I recounted how my horse, Cruz Bay, reared and dumped me in the warm-up arena of a big show. I didn’t want to ride him ever again after that! That vital superglue which bound us together, called trust, had dissolved and left a yawning chasm between us. Who’s to Blame? I took me a long time to realize that the blame for my horse’s behavior lay not with him, but with me. Horses need to trust us to be fair and competent leaders before they consent to follow our commands. Otherwise they take matters into their own hands, and we wonder why they’re ‘being naughty.’ I put Cruz in a frightening position by riding him in a crowded warm-up arena full of horses performing ‘threatening’ higher level movements which he’d never seen before. He wasn’t properly prepared for the claustrophobic conditions of a recognized show, with Grand Prix dressage riders practicing their lateral movements and extended gaits right next to him. He was a humble First Level guy used to little schooling shows with his First Level rider. Abandoning Ship When I felt him getting nervous, I should have kept calm, taken firm control of him and led him safely through a gap between the horses and out of the arena. I should have shown him that I was a worthy leader whom he could trust to steer him safely through scary situations. Instead I panicked and ceased to exercise authority. No one respects a leader who bails on his followers when times get tough. So Cruz took matters into his hands and exercised the only option he saw open to him: rear vertically to ward off the prancing horses closing in on him. Taking Responsibility I was so mad at him! How could he do that to me? How dare he frighten me like that! He was a bad, bad horse. Eventually I placed that anger where it belonged – on my shoulders. I realized that the whole situation was my fault and that ambitions to compete at a big show had made me lose consideration for my horse. I’d thrown Cruz (and myself) in at the deep end without sufficient preparation, and paid the price for it. Believe me, this self-evaluation process was very, very slow! I hated Cruz because he’d frightened me and made me look like a bad rider, followed by feeling like a quitter because I was giving up on him. That evolved into feeling sorry for him, and I began to ask myself the important questions about how it all went wrong. The Big Question When your horse does something naughty, ask yourself whether you’re being a good leader. Are you a figure of authority whom he respects or do you just hope he’s going to behave without giving him firm direction? Are you being fair in your expectations of your horse, based on your experience and his? Next Friday I’ll explain how my own answers to those questions set me on the road to recovering the broken trust between me and my horse. I really believed I was a Good Rider and Competitor Extraordinaire after an amazing show year in 2007.
But I'd forgotten what a great leveler the horse is. Pride in a Perfect Show Season.... That year my husband's gray horse (photo left) won a local one day event with me at our first competition since moving to Maryland. Then my bay gelding, Cruz Bay and I won both classes at our first dressage show and continued to win all the next five shows, even when we moved up a level! Boy, I really knew my stuff and was poised to move up yet another level. Yeah, right. .....Followed by the Fall I took Cruz to a huge venue in New Jersey and boy, was I going to show them! But when I rode him into the warm-up arena we couldn't believe how crowded it was, or the number of Grand Prix dressage riders who rode straight at us in extended trot - and I mean, extended - or attacked our flanks in canter half-pass. Cruz felt intimidated by these large, muscular animals. Unfortunately I was of no use to him because I was reacting the same way. So when two massive horses came at us in canter half-pass from both the left and the right, Cruz was terrified and reared vertically. I sat out the rear, but the force of his landing ejected me out of the saddle. I sailed into the air and met the ground with a loud thump while my gelding galloped off around the New Jersey Horse Park. And Big Bruises Two paramedics picked my embarrassed body off the sand surface and asked what injuries I'd sustained. I replied (in tears, let's be honest): "A bruised ego." The next stop was Rite Aid, to buy two walking canes so I could hobble round the show grounds applauding, and pretending to be happy for, the other competitors in my group who were - of course - winning everything. My Takeaway (and Yours) It has taken me a long time to recover from that accident, and the journey back to restoring trust between my horse and me has been tough. Over that humbling period I've learned a lot more about riding and a great deal about conquering fear. This past season we were back in the show ring, and collecting high scores again (most of the time!). The purpose of this blog is to share what I've discovered with you. I really hope it will help improve relations between you and your horse and that you will share your experiences with me. See you on Friday for the first post!
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AuthorHorses are my big obsession, and I'm constantly striving to get better, smarter and more in harmony with my equine buddy, Cruz Bay. Horse Blogs & Sites I Like
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